It's only words...

those words really had taken my heart away...I loved the song which they would show on MTV again and again, in those days (1996)...K was listening to his favourite oldies today, and this came up...



and this was my favourite when I was 16...mere rang mein rangne wali...

Wish You a Merry Christmas - Christmas Songs

Here are some of my favourite Christmas songs. Click on the songs on the player to listen to them individually.

Wishing the world a Merry Christmas and a very very Happy New Year 2009

12 Days of Christmas
Silent Night
Let it snow...
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
Santa Claus is coming to Town...
Jingle Bell Rock

I love snow...

"It is a fort Mrs. Chatterjee. We are fighting a battle. Look at this...this is a secret door."

"Oh Wow, looks good"

" Mrs. C, the grade 7 students took our snow ball."

"What do you mean, they took your snow ball? They can't take it home..."

" We made a huge one yesterday there, and the grade 7 boys rolled it over to that spot and it is too heavy now to roll it back to 'our place'. "

"OK, so now what should you do? Guys! share and play"

"I love snow Mrs. Chatterjee"

"Me too."

It snowed heavily yesterday. In these last 5 years, I have got used to the snow and the horrible driving during snow, and in fact I have started loving it...will post pictures to this post later...

We can only feel helpless...

Another day of terror in Mumbai, 150 people killed and so many injured...Hotel Taj... India... died... injured... killed... terror... attacks... the radio is constatntly announcing and breaking news. A few TV channels in India are covering this story all along, without any break. Well, the world has stopped... has it really?

My heart goes out to those people who are facing it, who have lost their family or friends in these attacks. I can only feel helpless... what a destruction! What a shameless act! A landmark of Bombay, Hotel Taj has felt the terror many times before. We all have the same question, " When is it going to stop? When will we feel safe to walk on the streets? When...?"

those days...

I got this as a forwarded email, but this made me so nostalgic. I am unable to post the full email, needs a lot of cutting and pasting and uploading, but a part of it is here...


How did one survive growing up in the 70's, 80's and 90's?

We had no seatbelts, no airbags and sitting in the back of a truck was a treat…

Our baby prams had the most gorgeous lead based colours…

No such thing as tamper proof bottle tops…

Opening kitchen cupboards was a breeze… as safety locks were unheard off…

Cycling was like a breath of fresh air… No safety helmets, knee pads or elbow pads, with plenty of cardboards between spokes to make it sound like a motorbike…

When thirsty we only drank tap water, bottled water was still a mystery…

We kept busy collecting bits & pieces so we could build all sort of things … and we were fearless on our bikes even when the brakes failed going downhill…

We were showing off how tough we are, by how high we could climb trees & then jumping down….It was great fun….

We could stay out to play for hours, as long as we got back before dark, in time for dinner…

We walked to school, or sometimes we even rode our bike.

We had no mobile phones, but we always managed to find each other…. How? No one knows… We lost teeth, broke arms & legs, we got cuts and bruises and bloody noses…. nobody complained as we had so much fun, it wasn't anybody's fault, only ours

We ate everything in sight, cakes, bread, chocolate, ice-cream, sweet sugary drinks, yet, we stayed skinny by fooling around. And if one of us was lucky to find a 1 litre coca cola bottle we all had a swag from it & guess what? Nobody picked up any germs...

We did not have Play Stations, MP3, Nintendo's, I-Pods, Video games, 99 Cable TV channels, DVD's, Home Cinema, Mobile phones, Home Computers, Laptops, Chat-rooms, Internet, etc ... BUT, we had REAL FRIENDS!!!! We called on friends to come out to play, never rang the doorbell, just went around the back…

We loved being let loose in the big bad world…without bodyguards…

We played with sticks and stones, played cowboys and Indians, doctors and nurses, hide and seek, soccer games, over and over again…

When we failed our exams we were given a second chance by simply repeating the same grade…without visiting psychiatrists, psychologists or counselors…

Such were the days… We had freedom, success, disappointments and responsibilities. .. Most of all, we learned to respect others… Are YOU from that generation??

I am...and I grew up in India...and it was fun...

Some Pictures from Pujo here...

at Bengali Club

at Vedant Society (Ram Krishna Mission)

at bharat swvashram

Pujo

...days fly by...today is Vijaya Dashami. The pain of Ma Durga leaving on Vijayadhashmi is not that intense anymore, as it used to be when I was a child. We had a small Pujo in Balco. Just one Pujo and the whole Balco would gather to celebrate. Shankh vaadan, dhunuchi naach, cultural functions... I miss all that. Life is different now, of course. Now I have to go to work during pujo, if it falls on weekdays. Well, this time I did take a day off on Ashtami, wore a new sari, offered pushpanjali at one of the temples, sang in the evening during a musical function. It wasn't zero 'pujo anand'. K and I celebrated Pujo in our own way too. Instead of having 'bhog prasad' at the temple, we prefered not to wait in line but eat in a restaurant, The Host. We have another puja during weekends here, for busy people who could not attend the Puja during the weekdays, so one more halla gulla is coming up. Kind of looking forward to it..,

Another Day

Today was a day filled with happiness and satisfaction. Right in the morning, as I opened my mail box, I saw a message from Raju Dada. Raju Dada used to be my neighbour in Balco. His sister and I were the best of the friends. Piu is in Australia with her husband and son now. We could not live without each other or live with each other. We fought like cats and dogs and played together like innnocent kittens. The email had her phone number. I called her right away and talked to her for half an hour. We talked after fifteen years.

After work, I went to a book sale with two of my colleagues. This book shop is closing down so they were selling a book for a dollar. I needed resources for my classroom. Reading is must in my class, every day. Every child reads silently for 20 minutes during their Language period. So I bought 40 books. My class is richer now.

My colleague, who is quite senior to me had her Birthday last week. We went out for lunch together. She has been one the sweetest persons I have met at work. We had Indian food at Tikka Tikka. Came back home earlier than other days. Two more days to weekend. Have to attend another kavi sammelan. K may not accompany me there. But that's ok, I cannot torture him more :-) Have a lot of things to do in my to do list. Have to write an article for a magazine, create an invitation card for our school alumni meet to be held in December this year etc. Let me see when can I get to all this. Signing off for now...chao...

Hindi Writer's Guild Launched in Toronto

Yes!!! It was me. I was at the beauty-parlour waiting for the beautician to finish with her customer. And all of a sudden I see a picture on the local newspaper lying on the table in front of me. The face was familiar and...oh my! It was me. Hindi Writers' Guild was launched 3 weeks back in Toronto. Renowned Hindi story writer Dr. Mahip Singh was the chief guest. I was a participant in the function held during the ceremony. It was a pleasant surprise. Anyway, here is a cutting from the news paper...

second sitting, right

Back to School

The noises, the laughter, the conversations and everything else was so familiar. I loved it. This was my first year in this country when I was going to the same school as I did the previous year. It felt amazing. I did not have to introduce myself to everyone again, did not have to bother so much about my first impression, everyone knew me in the school and I could talk to my students about their vacation effortlessly. The so very familiar 'Hi Mrs. C' made me feel at home again. This summer I did not take any courses. I had just finished two courses back to back in June. I have always learned from these courses so much. The last course I took was for the students with special needs. Every teacher has a student or two in her classroom with special needs and it is always good to have some sound knowledge and professional training to help include these students in the class. I will be teaching English as a second language this year. I am still going through the students' files and records to know them better. This is what I have learned from my previous experience. It is extremely important to know your students before you actually start teaching. It is all about kids, they should feel safe and comfortable in the class and should be willing to take risks. It is important for the child to have the sense of belonging whether be it at home or school. I will be conducting one on one interviews with the students in a few days time to know more about them and connect with them. I am looking forward to the year ahead and learning more. Learning never stops. I am sure this new year will give me many more opportunities to learn and apply at the same time.

Rishte (relationships)

I met him online. It was 4 years back. He had joined one of the online poetry groups where I was the moderator and he was a good poet. So when he contacted me online to chat personally, I was not too much worried. I kind of knew him through his emails and his poetry. I started talking to him assuming he must be younger to me. He always added 'ji' (a word of respect) with my name. We chatted for a few days when one fine day I found out that he was actually quite older than me. So now I started adding 'da' with his name (a word of respect for elder brother) and he started calling me 'tum' (a word used to address someone younger). That is how it all started. He lived in the States and he would call me often. I started talking to his wife calling her 'bhabhi' (sister in law) and they would talk to my husband once in a while too. Time passed by and one fine day he said, " I might visit your place". He was visiting Buffalo for a poetry seminar. I invited him for lunch and he drove all the way from Buffalo to see us. Next, when we visited the States, we stayed at their place. His children called me ' bua' (aunt). And now we are almost a family. I ask for any help I need any time, and he is there. He is not my real brother but he is. Bhabhi is not my real bhabhi but she is. Last week went very fast. They were with us this week. They left yesterday. It was like my family coming and spending time with us from India. I wonder sometimes, how relationships are formed and how beautiful they can be at times. I love you 'da and Bhabhi.

रिश्ते बन जाते हैं
अनजाने ही कभी कभी
बिना सुलझाये कोई कठिन गुत्थी
सरल से सुंदररिश्ते बन जाते हैं

दूरी की सीमा बाँधते बाँधते
अपने आप कभी
खुल जाती है एक गिरह
और बंध जाता है रिश्ता
कभी उस बंधन से बँधे
कई और सिरे
खिंच जाते हैं
अनायास ही
इस बंधे डोर की ओर
फिर बन जाते हैं कई और
सरल से सुंदर
कच्चे-पक्के रिश्ते
अनजाने ही कभी कभी
बिना सुलझाये कोई कठिन गुत्थी
रिश्ते बन जाते हैं...

Martyrs' Shrine Midland

My aunt who lives in Missisauga wanted to visit the shrine in Midland. Today we took her and my uncle there. We attended the mass. This was my first time attending a mass at any church. I have visited the beautiful Vetican and other churches but had never got a chance to attend such a ceremony before. Singing the carols and saying the prayers with the Bishop were such beautiful experiences. Here is a picture of the shrine.

ज़रूर कुछ ग़म है 'दोस्त' तुम को

ख़ुदा के घर से जो आ रहे हो

meaning

what is troubling you my friend

you visited the shrine today...

"Unastrology"

Astrology has been one of my favorite subjects. I love the Science/fiction. I developed the interest when I was in University and gave it up recently. But it is like the subject Chemistry to me. Though I am completely out of touch, I cannot forget the resonating structure of Benzene or Toluene. I still remember the full Periodic Table with the atomic numbers and masses. Same is with astrology. I am not in touch any more, but I cannot forget the ascendant and moon signs and the significance of different planets etc. As soon as I come across a combination of planets in a chart in a conversation or a write up, my mind starts calculating. In the past, I have done many correct predictions. And I used to be amazed myself but then I realized, if fate is all decided already, why do we have to know it? And why do we have to work hard then? Planets may work but we certainly have a lot in our hands. I gave it up because I was a bit scared. I did not want to be completely dependent on astrology. I still love the subject but I do not do it anymore. I want my life to unfold naturally. Astrology may work, but 'unastrology' works better.

Live Now...

Never complete
Always looking for
A choice, the best
To fulfill the unfulfilled
Never true
Always in a world of illusion
Wearing a mask.
Try once
Stand naked
Bare without make up
And you know yourself
In this vast world
Totality is nothing
But completeness
A destination
Which you don't go after,
A period after any dream.
Don't dream and that is
The destination
Live now...
Now or never,
Feel now, fulfill now
Or never, ever

Butter Chicken

We had guests for dinner tonight. It took me less than an hour to cook for them. I tried cooking western food. Our friend is from India but his girl friend is from Austria, living in Canada. So I did not try cooking the hot spicy Indian food tonight. I had baked vegetables, stir-fried French beans, baked chicken, baked prawns, pasta salad and bean salad. Had it been an Indian menu, it would take me 2 days to prepare the items. The food would be cooked with a lot of spices and tons of different types of ingredients. The whole house would have smelled curry and all my oven burners would be occupied. I would be running around cleaning the mess and lighting scented candles to get rid of the smell. Indian food tastes yummy but it is not easy to cook. The most important ingredient which goes in the food is 'patience'.


Here is the recipe for the famous Indian butter chicken. I make it the most simple way. It really works well. Spices are available at any local Indian grocery store.


1 pound chicken breast cut into small cubes (serves two)
5-6 sticks of cinnamon
1 big tomato (made into puree)
a pinch of garam-masala ( ground cardamom, cinnamon, clove)
kasoori methi (dried fenugreek leaves)
dry corriander powder (1 table spoon)
red chilli powder
garlic-ginger paste (1 teaspoon each)
chicken tikka masala or chicken tandoori masala (3-4 tea spoon)
plain yoghurt (2 table spoon)
whole red chilli (1-2)
salt to taste
sugar (a pinch)
termeric powder
cumin seeds (1/2 teaspoon)
35% cream
cooking oil (1 table spoon)
butter melted ( 2 table spoon)
corriander leaves to garnish

Method:

1) Add yoghurt, ginger-garlic paste, chicken tandoori masala to the chicken and leave it aside for 3 hours.

2) Take a wok, add 1 TB butter and cooking oil to it. Add cinnamon sticks, cumin seeds, red chilli, tomato puree and fry till the tomato puree starts getting thicker.

3) Add termeric, chilli powder, corriander powder, garam masala, salt, sugar, kasoori methi. Fry for a while and then add the chicken to it. Cook until the chicken is tender.

4) Beat 35% cream (3 Table spoon) and add it to the chicken.

5) Boil for 5 more minutes and add the rest of the butter to the chicken from top (if you do not want to use this butter, you may not).

6) Garnish with corriander leaves and serve with naan (Indian bread) or rice.

Enjoy...

The Pursuit of Happyness- an amazing movie...

Just a few weeks of my vacation are left.. after a long time I got my real summer vacation where I would not work or think about anything else but relax. I would have loved to spend it with my parents in India but it didn't happen. I am still enjoying, watching movies, going to different places with my husband, talking to friends and writing poetry :-) Today I watched 'The pursuit of Happyness'. What a beautiful movie it is! It is a must watch for everyone. I could literally feel the 'happiness' while watching it. My struggle to get a job in this country was nothing in comparison, not even a bit of what Chrs had, of course, but the little struggle I had, the hardwork I did, and that special feeling of achievement when I finally got to the goal, can not be compared to anything else in the world. I have learned that one has to have his/her goal set and not allow anything to come in its way. Hardwork and determination are the steps to success.

watch a part of the movie here

Editors' Choice Award- To be in Love

Another letter arrived yesterday..."We are delighted to inform you that your poem has been awarded the prestigious Editor's Choice Award..." hmm...I have been receiving these letters through emails and mails for last 3 months. My email box gets filled with these emails everyday with praise and some kind of award. Oh well, I am not a great poet...it is just that I had submitted one of my poems to the 'abcdy.com' (...let this be anonymous). So after a few days I start getting emails about the selection of my poem, about getting its selected, its scope of being read at some international poetry function and so on almost everyday. Each email at the end has something to do with my paying them to publish it, or record it or frame it or...Wow! what beautiful ideas they have...so now I have stopped wondering howcome no one ever recognized my talent before. Well, I ignored all these emails and yesterday finally I got the letter about the poem being given the Editor's Choice Award. So now I can pay them again to get this certificate typeset and mounted on a plaque...blah blah...

Anyhow, here is the poem...

To be in Love

The silver beam of moon light
Pierces through my heart
The twinkling stars send me
Millions of little sparks
The happiness dancing on toes
And sometimes the pearls of tears
I have been collecting
These priceless gifts for years
I bathe myself
In that light divine
My inner being screams
With joy and I shine
The world today seems
How so beautiful I wonder
I never noticed the beauty
How does life bewilder
How wonderful is, I realize
To be in Love
I found it after all
The priceless treasure trove

some old postings...short story in hindi

Sunday, January 13, 2008

बदलाव-लघुकथा

ज़िंदगी चलती जाती है। हर साल कुछ नयापन सा लिये होता है, हर किसी के लिये, मगर मेरे लिये नहीं। कभी कुछ नया सा आता है और फिर उसी पुराने रास्ते पर चलने को मजबूर कर चला जाता है अपना नयापन वापस अपने साथ लिये। पिछले साल जो किया, वही इस साल भी, उसके पिछले साल भी, और उसके भी। हाँ कुछ अगर बदला है तो भौगोलिक स्थिति बदली है। पुराना शहर कभी नये में बदलता है और कभी पुराना घर नये में। मगर ज़िंदगी जैसे इसी जमाव में खुश है। इत्मीनान आराम की ज़िंदगी का आदी हो जाता है इंसान। बदलाव चाहता है पर फिर नयेपन से घबराता भी है। नींद और ऐसी सोचों का पुराना रिश्ता है। सुबह अलार्म की आवाज़ से नींद खुलती है। मशीन की तरह उठ कर अपने आप ही पैर किचन की ओर बढ़ जाते हैं, चाय बनानी है, रमेश के कपड़े इस्तरी करने हैं, मुन्नी को तैयार करना है, और खुद आफ़िस जाना है। ज़िंदगी है, वही पुरानी, आराम कहाँ है।

आज मिस्टर मेहरा का फ़ेयर्वेल था। रिटायर हो गये हैं। अब घर पर आराम होगा, कह रहे थे। बहुत खुश दिख रहे थे। मगर आखें छलक भी रही थीं। बदलाव आ रहा है ज़िंदगी मॆं उनके, तो खुश हैं कि दुखी कहना मुश्किल है। मैं रो पड़ी थी। मेरे आफ़िस जाइन करने से लेकर आज तक मिस्टर मेहरा ही ने मुझे सब कुछ सिखाया। बड़े भाई की तरह ही हमेशा डाँटा, समझाया। कुछ खाली पन हो गया है अब यहाँ। मगर ज़िंदगी चलती रहती है। कुछ भी नहीं बदलेगा। कुछ दिनों से यही सवाल खाये जा रहा है, क्या कुछ नहीं बदलता? बोर हो चुकी हूँ इस ज़िंदगी से। लगता है कभी कभी कि एक ज़ोरदार कुछ हो कि मायने बदल जायें ज़िंदगी के। मिस्टर मेहरा की जगह खाली हुई है। कल उनकी जगह कोई और आ रहा है, सुना है कि चयन तो हो चुका है। खैर, कोई भी हो, ज़िंदगी वही रहेगी।

कुछ बदलाव आये हैं। मैं ज़्यादा सजने सँवरने लगी हूँ आजकल। कोई कह रहा था आजकल ज़्यादा खुश भी दिखती हूँ। आजकल सब कुछ अच्छा लगने लगा है। रोज़ सुबह उठना बुरा नहीं लगता। ज़िंदगी बदल रही है या बदलाव का ढोंग है पता नहीं। पर नयापन अच्छा लग रहा है।

आज मुन्नी से मिलने का दिन था। कोर्ट ने सप्ताह में एक ही दिन मिलने के लिये दिया है। सच बदल गयी है ज़िंदगी। अकेले रहना आसान नहीं। ज़िंदगी गवर्मेंट के क्वाटर्स की पुरानी एकरंगी दीवारों से बदल कर चमकते फ़्लैट की दीवारों की ओर रुख़ करने की कोशिश में बदरंग तो नहीं हो गई? मुन्नी से मिलने की आस में ही सप्ताह गुज़र जाता है। एकदम नया रंग है ज़िंदगी का। मगर बदलाव कहाँ है। भरे पन में भी खाली पन था और खालीपन में भी खाली पन है। अभी भी वही है ज़िंदगी। चल रही है। सुबह उठना, अपने लिये चाय बनाना नहीं बदला और न ही आफ़िस जाना। हाँ, भूगोल फिर बदला है, आफ़िस की चारदीवारी बदली है, घर बदला है। मगर और सब कुछ वही है। ज़िंदगी इस मोड़ पर आ कर पीछे ताक रही है। सच कुछ भी तो नहीं बदला।